Knowing a loved one has a life-limiting illness can make the holidays bittersweet. But as Tim B. of Des Moines learned last year, assistance from an in-home hospice provider can place a little more focus on the “sweet” and allow families to make treasured memories.
“WesleyLife started caring for my wife just before the holidays last year,” Tim says. “They enabled her to have some really good days, and she felt well enough to celebrate with our family on Christmas Eve. It seems strange to say, but she lived really well during those final months.”
November is National Hospice and Palliative Care Month -- a good time to talk about what hospice is and isn't, and a natural time to begin the discussion. Often, when families are together for Thanksgiving, they notice changes in a loved one's condition or engage in conversation about challenges around quality of life, caregiving, or other issues related to a loved one's illness. Honest conversations around care plans can actually result in a less complicated and more meaningful holiday season for all involved.
What Is Hospice Care?
First things first: You may not be entirely familiar with hospice and the services that are offered. In a nutshell, hospice care focuses on quality of life, on the wishes of the individual receiving services and their loved ones, and on easing distress in the months preceding death.
Virtually anyone diagnosed with a life-limiting illness (with a life expectancy of six months or less) can qualify for hospice services, enabling them to live life in comfort for the time that remains.
If a family member is ill and you've been wondering if hospice is a logical next step, it may seem counterintuitive to think about “living” in conjunction with services offered at the end of a person’s life. But during hospice care, a person is living — and it’s important to understand that hospice services can actually help ensure quality of life.
How Does Palliative Care Differ From Hospice?
If your loved one is diagnosed with a serious medical condition but it is not considered terminal, then you should consider palliative care. Like hospice, palliative care offers specialized support for enhancing physical comfort, mental health, and emotional or spiritual vitality. Unlike hospice, palliative care can be offered alongside curative treatments and is not associated with the end of life.
Both palliative and hospice care can play a valuable role in helping those with serious health conditions make every day as comfortable and fulfilling as possible.
What Does Hospice Delivery Look Like?
Options for hospice services are nearly as varied as the individuals who seek them. They range from home care to services in a freestanding hospice center to hybrid models, and the type of care you and your loved one select is truly an individual choice.
"In our case, home hospice services made sense because my wife, like many people, was committed to living out the rest of her life in her favorite place — our home," Tim says. "At first, the care team came once or twice a week; then the visits became more frequent.”
"Basically, their role was to make sure my wife was living exactly as she wanted to — whether she wanted music, food, whether she wanted to do her needlepoint or go sit in the garden and watch the birds. Hospice was able to handle the logistics, and I was able to enjoy spending time with her and not worry whether I was caring for her correctly."
Tim's reminder is a good one: No matter the type of services you’re considering, you should always ask any provider on your shortlist: “How can you help me or my loved one continue to LIVE through this stage of life?” As you think through that, consider the ways you and your family want to spend time together. For some families, like Tim's, it’s comforting to have hospice providers care for the person who is ill in their home so family members can gather around and simply enjoy being loved ones.
Make the Most of Every Season with Specialized Support
Making that first call to a hospice provider can be difficult, but having care in place for the holidays can actually help make these special occasions more relaxed and meaningful for your loved one and the whole family.
“No one wanted to admit we needed to call hospice, but once we met with them and set up a plan, we breathed a sigh of relief knowing my wife would be comfortable at home, and we could focus on making Christmas as special as possible with her favorite traditions,” Tim says. “Now, looking back, we are so grateful for those memories and will treasure them.”
Learn more about hospice care, including how best to support your loved one, in The Complete Guide to Hospice.
